Haikus

So, auntie splenda posted this haiku the other day. It inspired myself and my fellow Instructional Designers to to write our own, work-related haikus. Then, she posted a blog with the original haiku, plus our Anthem haikus. Now, I'm posting it all for you to enjoy!

Forget the facts, man
Anthemize the polished turd
Boss says: Crank it out
--CHELSEA

Wings plucked by the queen
Worker bees cry in their beer
Who's the slave now, bitch?
--SEAN (a variation on the Fight Club haiku)

In my cubicle
Words of retards on my screen
Electronic poop
--SEAN

My baby is tied
Up on my cube, but he lucky
Yeah, he real luck
--MAT

Blood will be spilled!
And it won't be mine. Are you
Worthy banana?
--MAT


*****Let me clarify some things:

(1) Anthem is where I work. When we change things so they are not necessarily factually or grammatically correct, we call it "Anthemizing."

(2) Mat's tied up baby is really an oversized, stuffed Stewie who is bound and gagged with Scotch tape.

(3) The "worthy banana" - well, this crazy lady who used to work with us once brought in a banana for lunch, didn't eat it, and then wrote "worthy" on it. We're not quite sure why...